I hope you had a meaningful day of reverence and spiritual connection. Im especially thinking about my mother and honoring her today. I love her. I miss her. I am still in awe of her. I would like to be with her again one day.
I have been trying to cook recipes and wondering what would my Mom add to make this taste better? Sugar? Cream cheese? Worschester sauce? She loved lemon meringue pie, but I did not buy one for today, because we just had Halloween. I am trying to get my diet back on track.
A family friend once told my Mom that she was like a hothouse flower, who needed to be moved into the sunlight outdoors. I felt like her today, wanting to be comfortable inside. It’s more comfortable for me to stay in my room and in my shell too.
I have a picture of my grandmother too. My father’s mother was a widower for a very long time. She had a sad childhood and experienced a lot of loneliness throughout her life I feel. Despite having 5 children, and many more grandchildren, she seemed lonely. After losing her husband and youngest son, her children grew up and moved out, she was alone a lot of the time in her house. Looking back I wish that I had visited her more because she was so sweet and appreciated my company. I knew she loved me and I loved her.
Too much solitude can trigger depression. I need to change up my surroundings, get active outside, and socialize with people too! So I did venture into the backyard today. It was still damp and kind of cold from the rain. It would have been good for my Mom to push herself to do these things. I only have control over myself though, and what I do, in the present. So today I went outside…briefly.


















