Meanwhile in Carlsbad…

Football? Who watches football? In Crocs and socks no less? I am still celebrating my birthday! Had I been watching the game I would have been loyal to my lovers team the San Francisco 49ers. I predict the Kansas City Chiefs will win the Super Bowl anyway, so be forewarned! FYI My wedding ring was nicer from the get go. I should wear mine too. It is enviable!!

A great present that I received today. My friends know me and my troubles very well. I will begin setting intentions with my crystals. Football is stupid anyway and the least of my worries.

Here is a gift that I received from a friend awhile ago. A candle for when I am feeling particularly witchy, because two can play this game.

Carry on with my birthday weekend

 Unwinding at dusk 

Evil man still stalking me

 There is one thing that I take seriously. It is the danger of an angry jilted discarded man. A Jilted booty call acquaintance male can make your life a living hell. I had an acquaintance who I dont regard as a friend looking back. He was a toxic jealous acquaintance who didn’t want to take me out on dates or treat me nice. He would scream at me insult and intimidate me when I would not come over for a booty call. I should never have gone over to his apartment because he is crazy. I think that he is bitter that I moved out of town and married someone else. I never loved him and I would never have married him even if I remained in Los Angeles. He was not the one for me. He is not my soulmate. He is married now but he drives down to Carlsbad to drive past me and raising his middle finger in the air at me. He is trying to ruin the good vibe of my birthday weekend celebration. I won’t let him through. It is so Trippy and unfair that I can’t get a restraining order against Tony Meister because he is scary. He has no business in Carlsbad and he is bothering me. In a perfect world I would be able to keep him out of Carlsbad completely. Stay in LA asshole!

Maeve: Well well well! I thought you Trey and I were the only delusional love triangle here.  Your brain is a rubicks cube of imaginary relationships. You just can’t figure it out! Your romantic missteps are getting you more and more lost. You will never know for sure if Trey or Tony really have feelings about you because they never say word one to you. They probably have moved on completely. You are overthinking and mixing up your memories about your past relationships with them. Your mind is playing tricks on you. You are hallucinating these men driving by, most likely. Or Maybe we are all stalking you. Maybe we get a sick kick of confusing you and messing with your mind. We are setting you up for failure again and again and you never see it coming. You truly are Charlie Brown. You have to be the biggest loser that I have ever seen in my entire life so be forewarned.

Out of the blue…

Out of the blue, Valentina starts speaking to me again. She comments on my most recent Blogger posts. She’s back!

Valentina: Oh yeah. Right. You are being hexed? We are practicing Santeria on you? What? Just because I am Venezuelan, you assume that I am practicing Santeria on you. Get it straight. As my Pinterest page proudly proclaims, I practice Voodoo. Not Santeria. Well maybe a touch of both, for good measure. Be very afraid. You don’t know how I do, that Voodoo that I do. Be forewarned. A good Catholic like you, would never dabble in the dark arts. Pfft! Maybe that is your problem. You are so tied in to your Catholic roots and to your family. You don’t want to veer from their lead and disappoint them. You are a sheep. That mentality will do you in, for sure! You will never figure out what I am doing and how to stop me. I will always be 10 steps ahead of you. And as far as Trey is concerned, Maeve keeps him on a tight leash. She is miles ahead of you and will most certainly never let Trey go. You can’t figure out why he hasn’t left her yet? Well it’s not black magic. That idea is nothing more than an insulting insinuation on your part. Perhaps Trey is tied to his good word and to his old-fashioned marital vows? He is different than you, who were never true to your marriage. You were distracted by Trey, from the get go. You need to circle back to Stephen, before I hex your health. That’s coming next. FYI Your children’s mental deficits are a direct result of your mental deficits. Also, they need your full attention, as imperfect of a mother as you are. Get a clue, bendejo! He is never leaving her. Now get back to your mundane housework, Cinderella! Be forewarned.

Maeve: Cinderella? You’re not Cinderella. Her house was immaculate! You don’t lift a finger. Your house is a wreck. I am seeing to it that Trey knows how sloppy and lazy you are. Prince Charming already found his princess a long time ago and she is a domestic diva so be forewarned.

Maeve: Little does she know that Trey does a generous amount of housework. He is the perfect husband! Eat your heart out! Be forewarned.

Flashback to my childhood

I believe that my family and I were at an art fair in this picture. Whereabouts unknown. All I remember are trees, hippie artisans, and cotton candy, which made for a good day, if you ask me. It is the closest to Santa Cruz vibes that I ever got.

My mantra for my 48th year of life

This Friday is my birthday so I have been doing a lot of thinking. I was just driving out of my culdesac to pick up my daughter from school and one of my neighbors was mad dogging me. He may or may not be attracted to me but we are both in relationships with other people. Anyway I just don’t care about him and his attitude problem. It’s not my problem. I admit here that I am the type of person who some people like, some people don’t. I am a bit of a rebellious adult because if someone is going to sit there and mad dog me and give me bad vibes, I might to give it right back to them. People give me hard looks all the time. I have no idea why, as I don’t know them at all. They don’t know enough about me to hate me. I may at times give them a hard look back because I just don’t care what they think, at this point. I will try to curb the madogging for anyone under 18 ie. at my kids school because those kids are likely going through something. But my mantra for 48 is I just don’t care about haters anymore. Life is too short to make their problem, my problem. If someone doesn’t like me or wants to act like they don’t like me, I am not going to sweat it and wonder too much about them. To my mad dogging neighbor:  I could care less if I ever wave to you or be an actual neighborly neighbor with you again. You are the one with the problem.

I still believe that I am being hexed

 I believe that I am being hexed and most definitely messed with, to say the least! Keith drives down to Carlsbad all the time to taunt me and make me think about him. It distracts me from my relationship and my reality. I always go down the road of romanticizing the past and the missed opportunities. I imagine that I had all these opportunities with Keith that I really never did. If Keith is so interested in me, why doesn’t he ever make that solid break from his wife and move down here? I keep beating myself up and blaming myself. It is such a waste of time to do that. It’s painful and pointless. I also believe that his wife is truly jealous of Keith’s feelings for me and has it out for me. I tried to tune them out for so long by avoiding looking at their social media. It always makes me so jealous to view their loveydovey, annoying posts. It doesn’t help that Keith’s wife is an unbelievable show off. She gets off on women, mainly me, being jealous of her. She really milks putting out there how good she has it and how spoiled she is. I find myself competing with her for no reason and trying to make my social media pictures similar to hers, if not better. I feel prettier than her since getting fat injected into my face but I really struggle with my weight. Keith’s wife  is a petite gym rat who has never been pregnant or given birth. I mean she is tiny and tough to beat, in terms of body. I do think she works out to keep her leverage over me, whereas I am totally unmotivated to break a sweat and I let my gym membership lapse. In 2019 my mother died and I hit a new weight low point. I mean I gained a lot of weight by the beginning of 2020. It is so odd because on my birthday, January 27th,  in 2020 I peeped their social media photos once again to see this public picture of Keith carrying his wife around in his arms and posing for pictures in front of their house. On my birthday, of all days, it was a slap in the face. He knows full well that January 27th is my birthday. Keiths wife was is and will always be a conceited bitch and I think that Keith will always have unresolved feelings for me and unresolved anger at me. It’s probably better that we remain apart because I think that they have it out for me more than Santeria and what they are saying to me telepathically. They get a sick kick out of messing up my life and just generally taunting me. Life keeps happening to me, while I’m busy making other plans with Keith. Then I peep their social media posts and I get slapped in the face with reality. One of the things bothering me is that Stephen reminded me that if I never fell for Keith, leading to my divorce from Stephen, and we had stayed in our home together, the beautiful house that we shared would have been completely paid off by now. Sigh! I am becoming keenly aware that Keith and his wife are both Type A assholes, nothing like me, and no one that I would care to know. You can keep your “carrying-you-over-the-threshold-in-every-picture-stooge!  I hate you both, bitches!

Monday January 23, 2023

I went on Instagram last night and I saw a picture of Trey smiling while holding a chihuahua. It was confusing and disappointing because I thought he was going to spend the weekend here. What was he doing there? I didn’t see him anywhere. I couldn’t even hallucinate Trey if I tried. He was apparently living his life with Maeve in Santa Cruz. I am feeling disappointed now.

Maeve: So…eat your heart out. Trey and I had a fabulous weekend together! I know how to keep my man happy. That is why he is still here with me in Santa Cruz. You were a fool to ever think that he would leave me for you ok? Trust the pictures that you see on social media. Our pictures tell the truth. Trey and I love each other like crazy. I show him so every day by basically tackling him and initiating sex. You can’t compete with that because you are frigid! Ha! Trey knows deep down inside whose heart is pure and who is willing to put in the hard work to keep a marriage going. I know how to keep Trey happy and satisfied, unlike you, loser! Sorry for the reality check. Looks like you are staying put in Carlsbad and Trey is remaining blissfully happy in Santa Cruz with me. Get used to it and get over it! Be forewarned.

Remembering the last time you shared your vacation photos

 

My spirit rat

 

OMG thanks

 

Wedding disasters

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRpfJ1NK/ 

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRpfJ1NK/

At almost 48 years old I am feeling pretty content that everyone my age is already married and I don’t have to experience anymore cringey moments at other people’s weddings.

A great idea?

 While I am driving and listening to an anti-drug commercial on the radio, a voice in my head, offers a suggestion to me. I know better though. She’s just trying to mess me up again. 

Maeve: I have a great idea. You should try Fentanyl! Yeah just go find some fentanyl and snort it. Fentanyl would most definitely kill you and save me the trouble. Sounds good to me. Be forewarned. I hate you, so I am hexing you. Therefore,  I definitely don’t have your best interest at heart. Speaking of heart, you are trying to steal a huge chunk of my heart, so you get what you deserve. I am going to mess with you. I am going to mislead you. I am going to insult you, as much as possible. I hate you for messing with my marriage and my man. If my husband, Dr. Trey Sanders of Santa Cruz, leaves me for you, so help me God, I will most certainly kill you. You can bet your life on that. Your crosses, your crystals, your halfhearted prayers will do you no good, so be forewarned!

Psychic ranks the most to least affectionate signs

 I agree that I (Aquarius) am not affectionate. We are cool. Aloof. I hate PDA and especially watching the PDA of other couples. I am dreading Valentines Day. I am going to crawl under a rock until it is over. Meanwhile Mrs. Perfect Aries Maeve is the most affectionate sign listed and has an awesomely affectionate spouse (Leo) as well. They will be snuggling and romancing it up this V Day. It will be a date night for sure. Why they hell not? They are still footloose and fancy free, with no children. I, on the other hand, will be wondering what they are doing all Vday/night and hearing voices most likely. Sucks for me. 

So it’s not just me?

 

Overnight oats

Yummy! Here is a great and super easy recipe with a little humor. And Quit sending my overnight oats your negative energy!

FYI someone in Santa Cruz made this video ( probably)

He asks me about heaven.

Trey has been speaking to me lately. Why did I receive this dubious honor? He doesn’t say much when he speaks to me. He usually remains silent, while his wife and her family ream me out. Of course, Trey is the sweetheart of my bunch of voices and I am sweet in return. I figure that if I am sweet to Trey in heart and mind, I can manifest an in real life verbal exchange or more with him. If I hallucinate Trey driving by again I should flash him or blow him a kiss at least. That would shock him into action hopefully. So here is what he most recently said to me.

Trey: Do you believe in heaven? 

Danielle: Yes, I do. Heaven is with you, babe.

My nicer voices, I imagine are Trey and I imagine that my nasty voices are my true enemies, such as, his in real life wife Maeve and her cronies. But in reality I hear random errant voices in my head. I just blame my voices on certain outside strangers.

Apocalypse climate change California flooding

 These California storms and the damage they are causing are frightening me. I feel like I am in the movie Airplane and this plane is going down! I want to tell you one last time that I love you. I have always loved you and I want to tell you that one more time before we meet our ultimate doom. 

However, You have been stalking me for years now. You have never worked up the courage to actually say anything to me. In 2014, I divorced my husband and moved out of my beautiful home away from my sweet children to be with you. I was convinced that we were going to elope. Whatever became of that? You have been traveling and partying and romancing your wife this whole time apparently. I thought that you were romantically pursuing me all these years on the sly. I was flattered. But maybe your motivation has more to do with hate and driving me crazy than anything. You are constantly showing off and reminding me what I could have had. You are a touch evil, in my book, so before this plane crashes I would also like to say that I hate you. My brother was right when he told me that I need to ultimately move past you, who remain married to someone else and can’t seem to find the motivation to approach/contact me. If I am so unhappy I should move on and date others. I know that there is a strong possibility that with our history and differences, you never would have made me happy either. But thanks for the drive-by attention if that’s all it was and ever will be. If we remain apart I am comforted by the fact that you will suffer and wonder until the end of time as well! So we are in this together!

Stuck in Carlsbad?

 Hmm selfishly I hope these sinkholes and road closures strands my man Trey in Carlsbad with me! I see an opportunity for extended closeness or at least as much as possible.  💗 

And they lived happily ever after?

I always hated the phrase “and they lived happily ever after,” which is posted on the bedroom wall of Maeve and Trey. It’s implies “fairy tale,” which is so unrealistic. Who has a perfect marriage? What a joke. Trey is just masquerading around as a happily married man and thinking about me on the side. Why else would he always be here in Carlsbad, trying to see me and be seen?

Maeve: Really? You just noticed that sign which still hangs on our bedroom wall? You are a pathetic, snooping stalker! Yes I believed that I was living a fairytale! I had found the absolute sweetest, most perfect man, for me. Little did I know that he had a woman lurking from his past who had rejected him years before. He still feels a certain way about you marrying another man, who was never your Prince Charming. Therein lies the problem. You foolishly chose a crappy life partner, which is your fault completely. Why does Trey ever waste a second of his time reminiscing about you? Why would he regret dumping an overweight, schizophrenic loser, like yourself? You attempting to ruin my fairytale marriage and steal my Prince Charming did not bode well for you, did it? I will hex you forever with the help of my loving family. I will happily stand in your way, preventing you from ever moving forward with your plan to escape with my man. Your lack of empathy for a beautiful bride and longstanding wife is astounding. You deserve the hate you are receiving telepathically, at the very least, and you can expect an eternity more of hate, on the way. Be forewarned.

Trying to lose weight

 It’s 2023, in mid-January, and I am still frustrated with my weight. I keep beating myself up over my inability to lose weight and get healthier. My family seems to have lost their patience with my weight as well. They constantly remind me of the fact that I used to be a lot thinner, once upon a time. My main problem is my Aquarian tendency to continually snack throughout the day. I also take antipsychotic medication that slows down my metabolism and makes me feel sluggish and hungry.

Here is a conversation between me and Stephen from today.

Danielle: Have you heard of the potato chip brand called The Uglies? They are supposedly made from ugly, unwanted potatoes. Eating these chips helps prevent food waste. It says so on the package.

Stephen: Do you want me to help you heat up that Tikki Masala for dinner? It’s better than eating, say…potato chips for dinner.

Danielle: I wasn’t going to eat potato chips for dinner. I was going to eat a lot more than that. These are just a pre-dinner snack. (So there.)

This is the first time in the history of our relationship that Stephen has ever tried to nudge me to eat healthier. Weird. At least one of us is losing weight thanks to starting diabetes meds. Unfortunately I am not the one losing weight. I wish I was losing weight. It’s very difficult for me to lose weight.

It’s Friday the 13th

Valentina: This is Valentina speaking to you. It’s Friday the 13th and we wanted to end your week with a few words about luck. You feel that your life thus far, especially your love life, has been unfortunate. You created your life outcome by acquiescing to the powers that be. You were foolish to let your faith guide you. You were foolish to follow in your peers and family members footsteps who rushed into marriage with the first person standing before them when they started feeling the rush to get married. You were too fast for Trey Sanders and you had different life goals. Maeve and Trey are still happily honeymooning and they are blissfully child-free. They can and do engage in the wilds of their passion on a daily basis. You have no one else to blame for your lack of luck in love but yourself and you are hard pressed to improve your situation at nearing 48 years old. Your brother may have a point for once. The Trey Sanders ship has sailed and he passed you by many years ago. Your story plays like a broken record. It’s time to take the needle off your sad, sappy song.

Matteo: You need to start singing a new tune or else suffer the consequences. It’s Friday the 13th and I have new ammunition in my bag of tricks. Leave Maeve’s husbands name out your mouth once and for all before I pull a Will Smith and slap the taste out of your mouth. I may have done it once before which caused that scar below your nose. You will never be able to prove it though.  I would do it again if needed, so be forewarned.

When the cats away…

 Maeve: Here is a little note from me to you. Danielle. When the cats away, the mice will not play. You wish! What a joke you are! You were snooping around on Instagram and found a picture of me with my luggage heading out of town on business? Yes I am always the fashionista wearing sweatpants Birkenstocks and socks at the airport. Leave me alone though! I am comfortable and also I could care less what you think. Maybe I am taking fashion notes from you now. You see my luggage? It reads Sanders right on it, as I took my husband’s last name many, many years ago. I was positive that we would be together forever and that is how our lives will play out, so you can eat your heart out! Be forewarned. Don’t forget to blame yourself for your own romantic failures and losses in life! I am sending you my hexes from Boston today. Sent telepathically, Maeve 

I just took this

 It is supposed to help burn fat reduce anxiety blah blah blah. Sounds perfect!

Me: Just an update that 1 day in on ashwagandha and I am feeling better already! I have less anxiety I think. Maybe this supplement works. It has good reviews.

Maeve: You haven’t been hearing voices lately because we haven’t been talking to you. We have been a little busy with the Pineapple Express that hit Santa Cruz this week. I just wanted to let you know that your peace of mind isn’t the side effect of your new “snake oil” supplement. You are an idiot if you think that quack pill from Goli will help you lose weight or diminish your mental health ills. Be forewarned!

I found this article interesting

 https://lifehacker.com/how-to-tell-when-you-re-being-followed-and-get-away-sa-5960699

I often wonder why I see people from my past, famous musicians, and celebrities driving past me while I’m driving around. I guess that I should focus on the road more.  I can’t help noticing that the people driving past me on a daily basis look very familiar. Could it be a hallucination related to my mental illness or is there something bigger going on here? The word must have gotten out that I am a muse and a good luck charm to many. I am not making light of people who are seriously being followed and stalked, but I believe that, in this situation, I am in no real danger. Unfortunately, no one has ever broken the fourth wall to confirm if they are driving past me for their own good luck or not. Maybe I have the Truman Show Delusion. What is going on here? I don’t know really.

The Waiting Game

I am over this waiting game. Is anyone else giving up hope for a past college love reunion? I am done waiting for my perfect soulmate to sweep me off my feet and carry me over the threshold. Why wait for an individual who is already “taken” and unavailable to invest in me? In the game of love, timing is everything. So I say to Maeve, “Kiss Keith for me!” (Since I am unable to) Sounds divine! I have to learn to be at peace with this idea in 2023. 

Maeve. This predicament is your own fault anyway! Your hesitation and fear brought us here now. We stand in this position 15 years later because you simply realized that Keith was/is infatuated with you? You changed your mind about him so many years after marrying another.  I am never publicly posting on social media again! It attracts stalkers and delusional people, such as yourself! You envy my life and wish to steal my husband? How dare you! You have got another thing coming! Even if Keith could break free from me, how would you vacate your familial home, where your children reside? You would abandon them, moving out of the same house with your teenage children, who still need you daily? All of this for your hormones and to fulfill your fantasies with Keith? What a terrible idea! You are a terrible mother for being so selfish! Are you still taking your medication? OC87 Recovery Diaries was right! You are one vain and misguided woman! Well, once a fool, always a fool, I guess. Wake up! Good thing that Trey Sanders is not seriously interested in a romantic relationship with you, as he is happily married to me! Eat your heart out! Be forewarned!

I never learned this!

Maeve is a pharmaceutical sales rep. I would have been a horrible salesperson. I actually tried telemarketing in Santa Barbara and failed miserably at it. Then I joined Cutco, in LA, which is basically a Ponzi scheme, where I was supposed to sell pots and pans door to door. Yikes. That was a nightmare. I don’t know how Maeve does it. I couldn’t hold down a job to save my life. I should have read the book, “How to win friends and influence people.” I never learned how to network. I should have joined a sorority in college, as much as I detest sorority girls. They are so petty and competitive. But thats life, right? Life is all about networking and competition. The sorority was probably key for Maeve, to attracting my love, Trey. Sorority girls are always cute, dressed cute, and put together. They would at least, be sweet, to the boys. I didn’t have one boyfriend in college and I was lonely. Millennials have a term called a “pick me girl.” That is a girl who talks trash about other women to seem “different” and get male attention. Thank goodness that term wasn’t used when I was in college because “guilty,” that was me. I was a loner, who tried to make other girls look bad, while avoiding them at the same time. I was trying to be “one of the guys” to get the guy. My plan ultimately failed miserably, as I never married the guy from college that I dreamed of marrying. 

Love Street

She lives on Love Street. Lingers long on Love Street. She has a house and garden. I would like to see what happens. I see you live on Love Street! La La La la la La!

I put a spell on you

 Because you’re mine!

Rainy day blues

Maeve: Whatever happened to partaking in Dry January? It is January 5th and so far, the only dry part of your January is your aging, peri-menopausal vagina. Yes, you are over the hill. You are too old for my studly soulmate, Trey Sanders. He is much better off with his younger, sexier, stylish, CrossFit #1 wife.  He doesn’t need a desperate downgrade like you, no matter what he whispers in your ear. “The sexual chemistry is palpable?” Pfft! You are dreaming and definitely delusional, so be forewarned. Heed your psychiatrist’s words. “Physical attraction and lust fades quickly.” After leaving his rocking wife and life in Santa Cruz, he would be left with an old, cranky, frizzy haired hag. My husband, Dr.  Trey Sanders, knows that he is too smart to get stuck with you. He is too good for you. Period. Be forewarned!

It is raining today and I am stuck indoors, for the most part. No wonder I have started ruminating and hearing voices. I am going a little stir crazy at home.

Val: Ok, now you have watched one TikTok about the flooding in Santa Cruz and you are attempting to wax poetic on it. As if you know all about Santa Cruz. You are a nerd who reads the Santa Cruz Sentinel to feel close to Trey Sanders. Stalker! Your evil ways brought the violent storm to Santa Cruz. If anything happens to the marital home of Trey and Maeve, it will be your fault completely. Evil begets evil. Adultery is a cardinal sin and you are next! You deserve to get slammed with freezing cold water! Prepare for the turbulent storm coming your way. Brace yourself,  Carlsbad! Be forewarned!

Why?

 Maeve: Why are you hearing voices in your head, you wonder? It’s a lot of bad karma definitely. You have spewed so much hate and negativity into the world. You have uttered many bitchy words to others throughout your youth and in later years, you proclaimed your love for one very married man. You messed with the wrong wife apparently, when one half of this marital union is admittedly a witch. I may look like your average American woman, but what is bizarre about me is that there is a proficient in magic, Venezuelan goddess in my DNA, as well. So sucks to be you now, I guess. Being on the receiving end of hexes and hearing voices is your new norm. Be forewarned.

Check out my TikTok!

 https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRbCDU9E/

Golden hair

I just heard this song, for the first time. Yes, Syd Barrett and I have more in common than mental illness, apparently. I too, love a beautiful blonde.