Bonne vivante!

After a long, hard day, I reach  for a drink. I pour myself a vodka and cranberry and took a sip. Before I can finish my drink, a voice chimes in, presumably Maeve. Before the alcohol even kicks in, I start hearing her snotty voice.

Maeve: Bonne Vivante!!

Me: Maeve must be showing off again. This time she brags about her well traveled life, her knowledge of foreign language, her culture (she is part French), her wealth, and her cultured food palate, in uttering this single phrase. Spare me! Buzz kill! Maybe I will go take a walk and burn off this frustration. I really hate it when Maeve talks to me! I have always hated when much younger females try to one up me or educate me on anything. That is an aggravating pet peeve that I encounter occasionally. Maeve fits that dilemma to a T. Ugh! I hate every word that comes out of her mouth!

Me: Bonne Vivante is a great expression though. “To the good life” also makes a great toast. I am not rich but maybe I will use this expression one day. I had to Google this expression after I heard it today. Schizoaffective Disorder teaches me vocabulary words occasionally.

Good night!

 

I never really dated seriously in my 20’s.

This statement brings to mind many things. I started out in my early 20’s not dating in college. I went to a hookup college but tried to avoid hooking up and feeling used. It’s a shallow lifestyle. No one at my college was mature enough for a girlfriend or maybe I just wasn’t considered prime dating material back then. Throughout college, alcohol and marijuana took over my decision making. When I turned 21 and started going to bars, I got into the usual troubles. (Beer goggles and drunken hookups) As I started pushing 25 I moved to San Diego and having gained weight was not desirable to the male dating population. So my point is I wished I had dates with gentlemen in my 20’s but that was not my experience. I didn’t get involved enough with anyone to need therapy upon our breakup. Trey lurks around Carlsbad to try to conjure regret up in me but he was never my boyfriend. I thought I would escape the heartbreak and therapy from him but apparently not because I am in therapy discussing Trey now.

Matt: In the 1920’s or in your 20’s. Be forewarned!

So what is the good news?

Matt: The good news is that Trey isn’t going to punish you for those last posts about his wife. Did he just disappear this weekend? You may possibly notice that you don’t see him anymore. The truth of the matter is that you never really saw Trey in Carlsbad. He was merely a figment of your imagination. Trey is in Santa Cruz with his wife, working hard but playing harder. Oddly enough, he never sits around thinking about you. You were not a major part of his college experience which was over 20 years ago anyway. Upon graduating from med school he has remained committed to Maeve. He is in love with his wife and life in Santa Cruz now and has no room in his life for another woman. His heart and hands are full. Be forewarned!

Holy smoke!

Holy smokes! They aged 50 years overnight! This picture is everything!! I fall into a hippie loving state every so often. I have had hippie leanings since junior high school. I am feeling a little hippieish but not THAT hippie!! I am also a proponent for laser hair removal. For those of you feeling this picture a lot, do you!! lol 

Maeve: She’s not being nice here and we would all love for you and your husband Stephen to lose much weight so be forewarned!!

Val: I know a little bit about laser hair removal too. If the hair is light gray, the laser can’t see it to remove it. In other words, this could be you, in the foreseeable  future so be forewarned!

Maeve: You are missing the point completely about this photo. He loves her unconditionally-chin hair or not. I wouldn’t let myself go in this respect either but I have nothing to worry about. Trey and I still love each other madly. We will be soulmates and lovers (like this beautiful hippie couple) until death do us part, so you can just eat your heart out! Be forewarned!

Matt: Insert Foreigner lyrics here. “I want to know what love is.” You have never been in love before and you know it. You never let yourself fall in love so you are pushing 50 years old and still don’t know what love is. Keep poking fun of other happy couples and making stupid jokes. You had a golden opportunity with Trey, you fumbled it, and now you are kicking yourself. Don’t bring Maeve into your warpath. You have no one to blame but yourself anyway. Be forewarned.

The most stylish gal at the gym?

 Me: People say that Maeve has the best style at her gym because she accents her workout clothes with a funky headband and bracelets. Pfft! If you were a child of the 80’s you would remember this guy. That is all she reminds me of and not a look that I am really shooting for so no! Seriously, I saw 5 girls walking around dressed like Maeve here in Encinitas today so it’s not a very original look.

Val: You are just jealous because you can’t keep up with Maeve and because you can’t steal Trey away from her. He is completely satisfied and in love with Maeve! You are no competition to Maeve so be forewarned!

I put a spell on you!

 

Beetlejuice!

 Envisioning Halloween with my man. Is that a no to the couples costume idea?

If you read Flavor Flav’s memoir…

 If you read the autobiography of Flavor Flav, you should read my book too. The Voices by Danielle Flore is available on Amazon. Someone actually bought my book a few nights ago. Miracle!! Thank you to whoever that was.

 

 

Chance encounter on the street

Handsome stranger: Hello. I couldn’t help but notice you were looking at me.

Woman walking by: Oh yes, you look like someone I used to know. 

Handsome stranger: An old boyfriend?

Woman: An acquaintance really, from college days…but I did have a serious crush on him. My crush intensified as each year went by. I was heartbroken when we graduated and lost touch. 

Handsome stranger: How sad! You never saw him again?

Woman: Well yes, thanks to the invention of Facebook, I did find him. Unfortunately he is happily married now and about a million miles away.

Handsome stranger: Well, he was a fool for letting you get away in the first place. You deserve someone who loves you, body and soul. You deserve a lifetime of love!

Woman: Thank you, handsome stranger. You bare such a striking resemblance to him. You look just dreamy! You must be in a committed relationship too. 

Handsome stranger: Well actually I am, but I have a very common look here in San Diego. Every other man looks exactly like me. Blonde hair, blue eyed hipsters are running wild in the streets. You should be able to find your match. I hope you find just who you are looking for. Good luck!

Valentina: Your blog is becoming a haven for cheesy vanilla erotica. Is that the direction that you are going in?  The male love interest has to be white, blonde, vanilla. Ick! Sounds very terrible and bland. Just a note of caution: maybe you should keep your poems to yourself as they are unexpectedly hilarious and everyone is laughing at them. Be forewarned!

Scrolling Instagram

As I scroll through my Instagram feed, I view a post from a band that I follow. (Rage Against The Machine) Next,  a voice chimes in implying that I am a hypocrite for following this band.

Val: You have a lot of nerve for calling yourself a Rage Against The Machine fan when you are a total racist, Karen. What is your problem with immigrant construction workers and gardeners who are checking you out? Why do they bother you so much? They may see a woman walk by, stop what they are doing, and maybe whistle, at the most. So what? Why does that irritate you so much? If you weren’t a total racist, it wouldn’t bother you so much. It should be taken as a compliment. You know what you should do in that situation? Flash them your breasts! That would prove that you aren’t racist. That would prove that you are “cool” with  them. Rage Against The Machine approves of this message. Be forewarned!

Matt: Stupid bitch! Rage Against The Machine approves of NOTHING you do, so give up now! Give up trying to prove that you are not racist and give up your pointless pursuit of Trey Sanders. Haven’t you figured it out by now? He is never leaving Maeve! It was all a joke. You should get a life and move on. And by the way, no one wants to see your aging, saggy breasts, at this point. Maeve’s breasts are still perky and she is a good 10 years younger than you, if that tells you anything. Be forewarned!

Maeve: and maybe 75 pounds lighter but who’s counting?

Val: I think that you should stop with the push-ups and let your arms turn to fat again. Then, at least, you wouldn’t have “man arms.” Be very jealous of Maeve’s thin, tone arms. You have to basically, stop your “all-carb diet” to achieve that. Be forewarned!

Halloween is approaching!

 

Drama of the day

You have an open marriage 

Mine is just unhappy 

You use your hall pass 

To drive down to San Diego 

And spy on me

You are the ultimate tease

Why are you constantly down here

In my business 

On my territory 

If you are happily married 

With no plans to leave your wife

What is the word for what you are doing?

Breadcrumbing!

We are not friends 

And never will be

Go play stupid pickle ball 

With your witch wife

Oh yeah and your competitive wife 

Kind of looks pregnant 

Is it me but does your perfect wife

Look a little pregnant in those pictures?

Leave me the hell alone Keith! 🖕 

**I feel like Slash’s ex wife Perla here. When you want someone back, the hardest thing in the world is accepting that you will never get them back.

Maeve: The couples that play together, stay together! Be very jealous of our pickle ball game, loser! Your game is weak!  You lost out on Trey Sanders, in a major way.  It’s your own fault for marrying fat Stephen, in the first place. Trey must have some unresolved feelings about that. With all of your silly accusations, in writing, we fully approve of him torturing you, the way that he is. Trey is “in” on our hexing of you! We hate you, so we are hexing you! Be forewarned!

Val: No one wants Trey to leave Maeve or Santa Cruz! No one! Except you, maybe, but you are an irrelevant home wrecker! Be forewarned!

Maeve: Oops I did it again is right! Trey tricked you into thinking that he was leaving me for you! You keep falling for his little tricks. As if! That would never happen! Be forewarned!

Watch out doctors and scientists!

She stole my dream life mate idea-doctors! Stay away from my doctor love Kim Kardashian or else!! I know he’s the perfect man but he is taken! Be forewarned!

Gosh man!

 https://timesofsandiego.com/crime/2022/09/14/naked-man-rescued-from-cliff-in-torrey-pines-taken-to-hospital/

Geez Keith you don’t always have to be naked. Put some clothes on and stay safe!!

Maeve: Yes Keith, you went to Burning Man with me and so she is inferring that we are always naked, which isn’t totally untrue. You are my husband Keith S, so be forewarned, I will see to it that you never desire to be with anyone but me. Least not a tramp from college that may seek to reconnect with you on Facebook. Don’t worry! I will show her how much fun we are having and more importantly how in love we are! Be forewarned!

Peace ✌️ Mad 😡 Love 💗

When you see your love

With his middle finger raised 

Driving around in circles

*I was excited to see you anyway 

Why come here breathing anger?

Let’s find our peace together 

I dream of our love  💗 

Maeve responds to my Burning Man post

Maeve: Your post here on Burning Man is ignorant at best. You have never been to Burning Man and you know very little about it. What you know about Burning Man you have heard from TikTok videos. You are just jealous that Trey or Keith (really) and I went there together. All I will say is that it was beautiful. We had the time of our lives together. We made love amongst the filth and you can just eat your heart out over that, so be forewarned!

Maeve: What really perplexes me is the fact that Keith was secretly lurking around you throughout our marriage in the hopes of rocking your romantic relationship and luring you away from your family. He has been having an emotional affair with a college memory that he manifested from nothing. You both need a psychiatrist and to stay away from one another. Keith’s sister was spot on. The answers you seek will come to you right where you are at. In other words, do not travel up the coast to find Keith in Santa Cruz…or else! Be forewarned!

List of people who don’t belong at Burning Man

Me

Keith 

Modest people 

Clean people 

People uninterested in group sexual situations 

End of list

Maeve: Your post here is ignorant at best. You have never been to Burning Man and you know very little about it. What you know about Burning Man you have heard from TikTok videos. You are just jealous that Trey or Keith (really) and I went there together. All I will say is that it was beautiful. We had the time of our lives together. We made love amongst the filth and you can just eat your heart out over that, so be forewarned!

Maeve: What really perplexes me is the fact that Keith was secretly lurking around you throughout our marriage in the hopes of rocking your romantic relationship and luring you away from your family. He has been having an emotional affair with a college memory that he manifested from nothing. You both need a psychiatrist and to stay away from one another. Keith’s sister was spot on. The answers you seek will come to you right where you are at. In other words, do not travel up the coast to find Keith in Santa Cruz…or else! Be forewarned!

I am just warming up

 I believe this is the anniversary of a certain couple that I am very very jealous of. To take my mind of their anniversary I decided to warm up today and every day (actually)with Tyler Sarry of Canada! Check him out!

https://m.facebook.com/watch/?v=1931029020424858&_rdr

I know that fear!

This petrified little soul was trapped in a spiderweb, waiting for its predator to come for her, so I freed the beautiful butterfly!

Lamenting over the article I published

 https://oc87recoverydiaries.org/author/danielle-flore/

You can live with schizoaffective disorder and be a wonderful parent. You can be a lousy partner to your spouse and still be a wonderful parent. You can get a divorce and be a wonderful parent. You can love your children to the moon and back throughout the hard times too. As long as my children know that I love them like crazy and I continue actively parenting them as they grow up, I will feel satisfied and self content with the parenting job that I am doing.

I must admit that when I wrote this article I was focusing on other aspects of my story. My children were living with their father at this point and I wanted to honor their online privacy so the article hardly mentions them. The editor and publisher (I feel) judged me for this decision. I still feel judged for making as they said “a vain and misguided decision” This is what was published. A story about how stupid and vain I am, based upon on a judgment by people I don’t know (and at this point don’t like) I wonder if I can unpublish this article, as I had to use my real name and it pops up every time someone googles me. So be it. It was a vain and misguided decision. I don’t consider myself vain for wanting to be healthy and thin though. My antipsychotic makes it hard to be healthy, as it slows down my metabolism and makes me very hungry. I am a warrior though and working daily on battling this. I don’t think that is vain either. So there!

Limerence

https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/limerence

I just learned this word from a TikTok video tonight and now I know that yes, I am addicted to Trey. 

Watching the news today

Did you know there was a flex alert for the past 10 days where we are supposed to save electricity from 4-9 pm?

Me neither! Why am I just realizing this today? Flex Alerts suck but not as much as rolling blackouts across California. My children would go nuts if we lost power and were in the dark without fans running etc.

That about sums it up

Yea for the next four months, she will be cruising around with her doctor husband, while I tend to my homestead, not watching the football games, but still hoping the 49ers lose!

Song of the night

 Someone serenaded me with this song over the speakers at Vons the other day. It takes me back to college and the guy that I wanted to marry straight out of college. What would have happened if he actually became my boyfriend right then and there, knowing all along that we wanted to get married soon after we got out of there? I had drug and alcohol issues, bad influence friends, untreated mental illness. I would have been the worst wife to him. Would we have started going to bars in our 20’s? Would we have gotten into a ton of drunken trouble? Would it have torn our marriage apart? I really wonder about that and I wonder about him and if he is thinking about me now.  He is probably with his wife right now, reminiscing about all the good times that they have shared together while married and I am so far removed from that and him. It’s sad.

It’s going to be a long weekend!

 Val: Why don’t you make a TikTok? Isn’t that what all the boomers are doing now? You are trying your best to remain youthful, to remain hip, to look good and get noticed. That is how I view your desperate selfies. Trey says “Keep up the good work!” Psyche! He is paying no attention to you. He is on a date with his beautiful wife Maeve whose Anniversary is getting closer.  Get ready to have your hopes dashed as Maeve becomes pregnant this year. Now is the time for a baby moon/anniversary trip! Congratulations to Trey and Maeve! She has got Trey on the hook for 18 more years at least! And you look ridiculous as Carmen Miranda, with all that fruit on your head! Be forewarned!

“Aquarians are classic underachievers with unrealized potential”

https://bestlifeonline.com/laziest-zodiac-sign-news/ 

Aquarians are pretty lazy. I agree as I sit here lying on the couch reading silly astrology stories.

Thursday night inner turmoil (9/1/22)

Maeve: You think this is all a fucking joke. You keep posting your jokes, not seeing the seriousness of the situation at hand. So, let me ask you point blank: What are you trying to do to my marriage?

Valentina: You have to be the biggest bitch that I have ever seen. You are a home wrecker, laughing at the chaos that you have caused.  You are jealous of beautiful Maeve. Just so you know,  you do not measure up to Maeve. She has style. She has flair. She has many friends. She is very sweet. We all love Maeve. What do you have going for you? A decades old sexual connection with Maeve’s husband? Get over it! You are 47 years old and over the hill completely. Never mind your continuing midlife crisis, your college crush is very married, and you can’t change that! Be forewarned!

Me: Maeve has this quote on her Instagram page. “Maybe she’s born with it, maybe she’s up in the air.”  I have no idea what that could mean. Either she is a witch flying around on her broomstick or she is bragging about being a rich and flying all over the world. Either way, gag me! She seems like a show off. Hate her!

Maybe I need to quit looking at her Instagram page. She just followed Treys sister who is a masseuse by profession and offers prenatal massage. I am waiting to peep who will pose as her next client. That will hurt me immensely if she does have his baby.