Friday, January 6, 2023
I never learned this!
Maeve is a pharmaceutical sales rep. I would have been a horrible salesperson. I actually tried telemarketing in Santa Barbara and failed miserably at it. Then I joined Cutco, in LA, which is basically a Ponzi scheme, where I was supposed to sell pots and pans door to door. Yikes. That was a nightmare. I don’t know how Maeve does it. I couldn’t hold down a job to save my life. I should have read the book, “How to win friends and influence people.” I never learned how to network. I should have joined a sorority in college, as much as I detest sorority girls. They are so petty and competitive. But thats life, right? Life is all about networking and competition. The sorority was probably key for Maeve, to attracting my love, Trey. Sorority girls are always cute, dressed cute, and put together. They would at least, be sweet, to the boys. I didn’t have one boyfriend in college and I was lonely. Millennials have a term called a “pick me girl.” That is a girl who talks trash about other women to seem “different” and get male attention. Thank goodness that term wasn’t used when I was in college because “guilty,” that was me. I was a loner, who tried to make other girls look bad, while avoiding them at the same time. I was trying to be “one of the guys” to get the guy. My plan ultimately failed miserably, as I never married the guy from college that I dreamed of marrying.
Thursday, January 5, 2023
Love Street
Rainy day blues
Maeve: Whatever happened to partaking in Dry January? It is January 5th and so far, the only dry part of your January is your aging, peri-menopausal vagina. Yes, you are over the hill. You are too old for my studly soulmate, Trey Sanders. He is much better off with his younger, sexier, stylish, CrossFit #1 wife. He doesn’t need a desperate downgrade like you, no matter what he whispers in your ear. “The sexual chemistry is palpable?” Pfft! You are dreaming and definitely delusional, so be forewarned. Heed your psychiatrist’s words. “Physical attraction and lust fades quickly.” After leaving his rocking wife and life in Santa Cruz, he would be left with an old, cranky, frizzy haired hag. My husband, Dr. Trey Sanders, knows that he is too smart to get stuck with you. He is too good for you. Period. Be forewarned!
It is raining today and I am stuck indoors, for the most part. No wonder I have started ruminating and hearing voices. I am going a little stir crazy at home.
Val: Ok, now you have watched one TikTok about the flooding in Santa Cruz and you are attempting to wax poetic on it. As if you know all about Santa Cruz. You are a nerd who reads the Santa Cruz Sentinel to feel close to Trey Sanders. Stalker! Your evil ways brought the violent storm to Santa Cruz. If anything happens to the marital home of Trey and Maeve, it will be your fault completely. Evil begets evil. Adultery is a cardinal sin and you are next! You deserve to get slammed with freezing cold water! Prepare for the turbulent storm coming your way. Brace yourself, Carlsbad! Be forewarned!
Tuesday, January 3, 2023
Why?
Maeve: Why are you hearing voices in your head, you wonder? It’s a lot of bad karma definitely. You have spewed so much hate and negativity into the world. You have uttered many bitchy words to others throughout your youth and in later years, you proclaimed your love for one very married man. You messed with the wrong wife apparently, when one half of this marital union is admittedly a witch. I may look like your average American woman, but what is bizarre about me is that there is a proficient in magic, Venezuelan goddess in my DNA, as well. So sucks to be you now, I guess. Being on the receiving end of hexes and hearing voices is your new norm. Be forewarned.
Monday, January 2, 2023
Golden hair
I just heard this song, for the first time. Yes, Syd Barrett and I have more in common than mental illness, apparently. I too, love a beautiful blonde.
