Tuesday, May 11, 2021

Brave post!



Instead of all the fake airbrushed photos I fall victim to posting I would like to be real. I have these photos from before I had fat from my stomach injected into my face by a plastic surgeon. The first photo was taken 8 years ago today. I was with my daughters in the photos but I have cropped them out to protect their privacy. Looking at the first  picture I was probably over medicated from my antipsychotic Abilify. I also may be exhausted in the picture as I had 3 small children. Yes I made the decision to have children despite my mental illness. I wasn’t going to let anything stand in my way. 

I feel like a skinny Syd Barrett (after he lost his mind)in these pictures. Unfortunately I look pretty out of it, despite being on nothing but my antipsychotic medication. How did I survive young motherhood like that? I would turn up the dosage on my medication every time I would see people or thought I saw people from my past or college. 

I was living in beautiful sunny San Diego but hiding in my house for years! Well I feel better now on a different antipsychotic and I feel pretty (wrinkles and all) for once in my life. This is what I looked like about 8 years ago and before my facial fat transfer. It’s hard to look back but it’s the haunting truth and may be the reason I never landed that cute blonde guy from college. Oh well! The truth hurts.

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