God help me today!

 And Happy Halloween to everyone (who isn’t hexing me!) Prayers for a relaxing day, without harassing voices.

Are you ready for couples therapy, babe?

What is worse, hurting someone unintentionally or intentionally? Or is it equally bad because the result is the same? The result being that you have hurt your partner. First I need a physical partner, but sooner or later we will be going to therapy together. ❤️ 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.goodtherapy.org/blog/does-hurting-someone-make-you-bad-person-0414164/amp/

Couples therapy: that thing when you want to talk to someone with your partner, about your partner, so you don’t lose your partner. Great concept! Maybe we can try that.

Hmmm interesting

 https://www.teenvogue.com/story/what-each-zodiac-sign-likes-in-bed

 

From the other woman: a poem with a different perspective

To Maeve:

From a distance it seems like 

You have been living and loving in his light

Enjoying his warmth and affection 

Reeling in his attention 

Soaking up the spotlight 

Letting it go to your head a bit

Dreading a let down and eventual end

Shaking off your competition 

Making your moves

Dancing in the spotlight 

Living your best life 

Did she see it coming 

It seems that someone stole the show 

Let’s just put that chapter to rest 

May the show finally end

Or be remade with a slightly different cast 

And a happy ending 

Maeve: There is nothing romantic about writing in the perspective of the other woman. Be forewarned! That is why no one is reading your blog, because you are clueless,  and because you write about the weirdest things!

Maeve: Listen to me! You will never steal my man, evil bitch, so be forewarned! You keep trying to paint us as the evil ones, when you are an evil homewrecker, so be forewarned. We may visit San Diego and see you in passing. Trey may even tease you, just to mess with you, but be forewarned, we are married, and living our happily ever after, so you can just eat your heart out! Be forewarned!

Thank you 🙏

Valentina: Why does she always say “thank you,” even when the situation doesn’t call for it?  She is racist and just says it to appear grateful and sweet. Chiara is neither grateful nor sweet. It is all a facade to play off her racist accusations of Santeria! Everyone hates you, so be forewarned! Don’t try to butter us up with “please” and “thank you,” when we are just trying to do our jobs. We are just trying to get by and live in peace, with dignity. We see through your fake facade, so be forewarned! We don’t trust you, as far as we can throw you either.  Don’t look us in the face, with a smile, and then turn around and complain about our hard working migrant worker amigos, who just want to look in your direction and be greeted with a smile, rather than an eye roll. Admit it, you love when someone treats you with deference, so that’s why you sweetly say “thank you” all the time. When confronted with one of my brown-skinned brothers or sisters, you should be greeted with ferocious attitude, like your friends at Vons! Be forewarned!

How the hell did I find him?

 I didn’t even know his last name.

 

 

Crazy drivers

People are driving so fast lately. They get impatient with me because I am a fairly slow driver. Don’t be that person who tailgates and tries to push the driver in front of them along. That is so rude and kind of crazy. This woman was driving behind me on the 101 and following me to turn left on La Costa Ave. She was impatiently pushing me along and when I failed to make the green turn light, I knew that she was behind me pissed off. I dared to look in my rear view mirror and was greeted with a combination death glare and smug smirk.

More wisdom from Ice T

 

The voices (in reality )

I have not heard a cruel word in the real world lately. The voices in my head threatened to start insulting me in Spanish, as well as English. Fortunately the good people I have had interactions with more than make up for the insults and threats that I hear in my mind.

For example, I was walking around my Dad’s neighborhood with him, and his neighbor called to me, “Hello, mi amor.” What a kind greeting! It made my day. I need to hear more of that!

Then I went out to dinner last night with my father and brother,and a man who worked at the restaurant came up to me and said “Bless you!” I had not even sneezed! He sent me a good natured blessing. It was so sweet! I could definitely use all the blessings and positive social interactions that I can get. Thank you to the good people that I meet!

Preach!

 

 

Fade: A poem

All things pass

And return to dust

The face of a lover

The voice of a rival

It is not worthwhile 

To play into your hallucinations

Just relax and let them fade out

Fighting: a poem

 I’m tired of fighting

With schizophrenia

Maybe we could just

Make up or something

Feeling a certain way about mental health advocates.

 

Take it from Ice T

 

 Maeve: What do you want me to say? You win? No way! I will never admit defeat. I will never concede to you, so be forewarned!

Valentina: This is Valentina. I hate her sooo much! If you even think of calling the police on us, all hell will break loose. If I have told you once. I have told you a thousand times that we will never stop hexing you and there is nothing you can do about it! You have no proof, so don’t get your hopes up about the Larry Millette arrest. You heard what they said about the spell casters. They called spellcasting a “myth.” The San Diego Police Department does not believe in spell casting and they won’t seriously be investigating the spellcasters.

Maeve: Why don’t the police come and talk to you? You know a lot about hexing. We have been hexing you since 2014…maybe longer. No one has come to arrest us yet, despite all of your pleas for help, so be forewarned.

Matteo: This is Matteo. I know that you are hot for Trey Sanders… Nice alias by the way, but we will prevent your relationship from ever consummating, so be forewarned. Don’t hold your breath anticipating your hot first date with Trey, because that day will never come. Trey will find his way back to Maeve somehow, so be forewarned!

 

Purple hair don’t care!

 I am not this brave! This is just a photo filter

Alarm: a poem

 I’m schizophrenic.

That’s ok honey he says.

(Alarm clock goes off)

It was just a dream.

I am declaring this to the world!

 Yes I feel that the love of my life is actually married to someone else!

This spooks me personally

 https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.the-sun.com/news/3891902/maya-may-millete-husband-larry-spell-casters-found-missing/amp/

When Larry Millette was arrested yesterday, I began to cry at hearing the news. This is a local San Diego case that I have been watching on the news a lot. It’s scary to think that people actually employ magic to keep or “incapacitate” their mates! Like I have been saying all along, people need to take more seriously claims of hexing. Hexing should be illegal for sure!

Did Larry Millettes spell casters do the right thing and turn him in or did they help incapacitate Maya so that he could kill her? This crime case has just become even more triggering for me!

https://www.google.com/amp/s/fox5sandiego.com/news/local-news/what-are-spellcasters-the-dark-magic-myth-at-center-of-millete-arrest/amp/

My Penance for beefing with the two women at Vons today

Well a John Leguizamo video was suggested for me on Facebook today. I wonder why? So I wanted to share a different YouTube video here featuring John Leguizamo. It is interesting and eye opening. I consider this my peace offering and penance for offending anyone through my story and blog. I am a work in progress. I also want to add that if my blog offends you, feel free to let me know directly. Thank you! Watch this funny, educational video too!

Boycott Vons La Costa

 The only reason I shop there is because it is a block away from my home and my family likes their products. But the people who work there for the most part are awful. I think that I actually hate one of their baggers and one of the assistant managers. They are worthless employees and haters. If they hate La Costa so much and the people who live here, take a job somewhere else. Their customer service skills are for shit! I would talk to the senior manager or file a formal complaint if they don’t clean up their act or I might just boycott and shop at Gelsons where they are nice to me and not trippers.

This poet read my mind!

 When I watch You walking away

I hear the Soundtrack

To my school girl Fantasies

But when You turn and Smile
As if to say, Goodbye
… For now…
My Heart Melts into a Puddle
At Your Feet
I can’t seem to Breathe
Or look away

This Is Not Mere Fantasy
But My Favourite Dream

Maeve: Why do you always write, or should I say plagiarize, poems about my husband? You bitch! I guess your little plan never worked because where is he? Huh? Trey Sanders is here with me in Santa Cruz, where we will remain for eternity, so be forewarned! He will remain married to me until the bitter end. Bitter for you, at least! Sweet for me!

Story line

 We played each other, like Violins

But I don’t remember how the Song goes 

Maybe it’s just time, for a new Story-line

Bragging 10/16/21

 My views over the past 7 days. Hello world! 

Oops I cheated on my diet again!

Maeve: Don’t eat that McDonald’s cheeseburger for lunch! Trey Sanders is a board certified physician. He is a doctor who feels a certain way about the food that you are consuming. He wants a petite woman, like me. Not some morbidly obese, unhealthy woman, like you. Be forewarned. I speak the truth. You don’t even know him. Trey Sanders is very particular about women. He would be mortified by a female companion who gained 50 pounds over the course of their relationship. If you noticed, I never did that! I remained very fit, with him, in mind. Meanwhile, what have you been doing? Drowning your sorrows in food and drink? Overindulging? Well, you reap what you sow, and so does Trey Sanders. I guess that he will be getting his just deserts, when your weight starts to balloon again. Be forewarned.

Wow!

 Or both? 

Still gonna try!!

 

Uh thanks James?

 

Treading water

“Just treading water in a sea of people who don’t understand schizophrenia.”

Maeve: What would you do if you were not on government assistance (amongst your other sources of income) and had to actually work for a living? You would drown! You would literally, sink to the bottom of the ocean, in no time at all, so be forewarned!

I thought this might help me

 I thought this might help me block any hex that may come my way. Who knows if it works?

Later on, I decided that the donuts were too much sugar and therefore, bad luck, so I only ate one and shared the rest with my family.

Dinner is served

Maeve: That is what you are feeding your daughter? Two hot dogs and a hard boiled egg? That is dinner tonight? Do you cook? What are you…a five-year-old playing a mother? Or are you an actual adult mother? Sheesh! 

Maeve: If that is what he wants in a partner, than that is what he will get! Good riddance! 

Brian Laundrie

 https://www.yahoo.com/news/tik-tok-sleuths-think-brian-021500024.html

OK I am just going to put this out there and I am not joking. I think that Brian Laundrie is in N San Diego County (La Costa, California) I have seen his doppelgänger twice now on La Costa Avenue. He put his head down in his car when I looked at him today. I tell you that any bald man with a dark goatee and big ears is probably sweating bullets right now wherever they are. Brian also has a scar through his right eyebrow. Do you think he could have made it to crazy California by now? There are so many wackos here already and San Diego is so self absorbed. I mean who of us is really paying attention and looking for this man?

Don’t look back in anger

 This song reminds me of college.

I thought of a slogan for San Diego today!

San Diego…the land of a thousand Keiths. Because even when I didn’t actually see you, I saw someone who looked exactly like you and that made me happy! You have a very San Diego look!

Asking for a friend

 Dilemma  #1

I have a male lover but I am madly in love with my housemate 

Who isn’t gay(?) and is only interested in a platonic relationship. We are very close and hold hands all the time walking around on holiday. He doesn’t feel comfortable in town. I have never overstepped the mark but I do love him more then my male lover whom we have fun together. This at times being in love eats me up. I havent told my housemate this.

Dilemma #2

I am living with the father of my children but I am madly in love with a man who I used to know in college who always drives past me mysteriously and may be a mere hallucination as I am schizoaffective. I haven’t spoken to the man driving past me since college and don’t even remember what his voice sounds like. Except the voice that I hear in my head. Yikes!

Ok so, what should we do and which dilemma has worse odds of working out? Please let me know.

 Actually I quite enjoy one or two of them!

 

 

Kierkegaard quote

 But would I have regretted it if I had married you?

Who is the real idiot here?

Maeve: Who is the real idiot here? You walk around thinking that everyone else around you is an idiot. Meanwhile, when will you finally realize that you just ended a happy marriage, for your own selfish purposes? It’s over and it’s your fault for writing desperate messages to my husband and posting thirsty pictures on the internet! When will you accept your role in the undoing of the blissful union of Maeve and Trey Sanders? It’s your fault and you are trying to shift the blame! You are trying to play the victim of our Santeria hexes! No one believes you anyway, so be forewarned! You look like a harlot ho! Be forewarned!

Eating some shrooms

 

Upside down

The agony and the ecstasy 

Of loving you 

Has turned my life upside down 

But I don’t want it to ever end

Please keep up the pursuit 

Because I cannot stop thinking about you 

And I am thoroughly enjoying your attention

What does our future hold

Who knows? Good things, I hope 

Meet Keith the Gringo Ranchero

 Too bad me and Keith never hooked up when we were younger and went to Mexico. So sad! 😭 

Do you have TikTok?

 https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRKtDXMo/

There are a lot of witches on TikTok if I ever needed some help with something.

Facebook is down

How am I going to Facebook stalk my “soulmate” now?

Valentina: So, yes, peace, love, and good vibes to everyone…except you! You can fuck off! I guess you can’t write about my Instagram page that bothers you so much, anymore. Maybe it’s a good thing that you don’t look at my Instagram page, if you are just going to write Karen-ish things about it.  Everyone loves me and my bohemian/spiritual Instagram page, except you! No one understands what your problem is with me, so be forewarned!

Clear (A poem)

I fought schizophrenia,

It looks like

There was no

Clear winner

That song

Do you have a song that comes on randomly when you are out at a restaurant and it takes you back in time? Does it remind you of a lost love or special someone from your past that you never forgot?  This even came on during an anniversary dinner with my husband at the time. Needless to say, it distracted me from my anniversary and back to that mystery man from my past. I found myself reminiscing and wondering why I wasn’t married to him instead. This is that song for me.

Nice night/no voices

 

Anyone interested in celebrating Halloween this year?

 My growing children, not so much. Me, see above.