Hello again!

 I have missed you but you were always on my mind! I love Willie Nelson! I am not a huge country fan but he is awesome and definitely the King of country music! Rock N’ Roll Hall of Fame 2023? He’s got my vote!

So I have not heard too many voices on my new medication. Despite a lot of stress in my life lately, I am managing just fine. As far as my hallucinations and conflicts with reality, I still hallucinate all the time. I thought James Hetfield and Kirk Hammett drove past me the other day. It was awesome to see them! I am a huge fan of Metallica! I still cyberstalk that guy from college and his wife. I hope you guys had a fabulous vacation. (Not really!) Looking at their annoying vacation photos, I had to face the reality that he is still married and not leaving his wife anytime probably. I can’t believe all the things his wife did in her life to hold on to him. She spoiled him rotten actually. Moving across country to be with him? Agreeing to not have any children? Yikes. I would not have done either of those things probably. She pretends to be fully stoked on sleeping in a tent in cold ass weather and BMX riding? What a great vacation! She seems full of it but that’s ok. She pretends to be super into watching professional male sports. Now I always thought girls like that were soooo fake. Anyway I guess he made the right choice. I’m better off too. The guy from college will always be on my mind though. My mental torture will always be thinking about doing things differently when I was younger, when I had a chance with him. It’s too late now. Oh well he will always be on my mind!

My new medication

 I don’t want to open the door to hearing voices which is why I have not been blogging. The well has run dry as I have no voices to report. My new medication must be working better than my last antipsychotic. I don’t want to jinx myself by taking too much about it. If you don’t hear from me here on my blog, it is because all is well and my medication is doing its job. I cannot believe I thought Vraylar was working so well when I was constantly hearing voices and going on tangents about them. On the other hand, without my voices, I have to think of something else to write about. I need a new story to tell. I am thankful to the makers of Caplyta as it works better than Vraylar did for me. Finger crossed that my luck will continue. I have not heard voices since March 16. Let’s see how long I can maintain this voice free streak!

In honor of St Patrick’s Day tomorrow

Here is Drake performing in Dublin. It must be the Irish in me. I love this song by Drake. The audience here is going crazy for Drake during this song! Wow!

This is true!

 

OMG

 I thought it was K!

The reason why no one reads this

 Valentina: The reason why no one reads your blog, much less buys your book is because you are a weak willed bitch. You are pathetic. In this day and age, people want to read the story of a strong female protagonist. They don’t want to hear the outdated notion that any woman would be a happier, better person if she attracts said man. Your protagonist is dependent on a man for happiness. You, Danielle, suffer from the grass is greener on the other side syndrome, as well. Let me assure you, that you will not be happier if you steal Maeve’s husband,  because we will make your life a living hell! Treys family will hate you! Your own family will hate you! Home wreckers get zero respect! If you didn’t have your head so far up your own ass, maybe you would be able to see that. Your story is racist and love triangles are the most tired, antiquated story line possible. You are lucky that no one is bothering to read your book, as it would get horrible reviews! You have been cancelled before you have even begun your writing career. We are not interested in reading the life and times of a washed up, old hag, so be forewarned!

Well it finally happened

 I had a dream last night where my mother spoke to me from beyond the grave. She advised me not to have any more children because they all have issues. While she was alive, my mom expected me to marry and have children. She was an Irish Catholic and she loved huge families. She had four children and she wanted me to have 4 or 5 children. She didn’t take into account my mental illness or how much it would tax me to have so many children. She promised me that she would remain close and be very hands on with my children. She wanted a lot of grandchildren in close proximity to enjoy. The problem with my mom was she preferred babies. What good would she be to my growing children? Eventually they grow far beyond babies into teenagers. Addressing teenage problems is very different than changing diapers. She never appeared to crave closeness to her own children during our teenage years. She was actually very distant and short with us during those years. I could have used more guidance and a more conversational relationship with her at that time. Anyway, I figured out that I had mentally checked out of having more children after having my third child who was very impacted with Autism. At that point, my mother still didn’t understand. She would deny my children’s autism or deny that they had any problems. She would tell me how beautiful they were and she wanted to see what the next baby would look like. I would like to think that she sees everything differently now and she agrees with me. I appreciate her giving me the advice and approval that I wanted to hear from her for so many years. At 48 years old I don’t want anymore children and I am taking steps to avoid another pregnancy.

Valentina: Get a clue! Your mother wasn’t talking to you in a dream. That was me insulting you and your children. I will see to it that you never come after Trey for baby #4. After all those years with Maeve and agreeing to live a fun filled child free life. Trey never had children with Maeve, his wife and the love of his life, so why would he want one with you? I want you to wipe any thoughts of child rearing with Trey Sanders out of your mind. Trey Sanders doesn’t want to have a single sexual encounter with you, much less a baby, so be forewarned!