Sunday, April 28, 2019

The study link below sites a relationship between childhood trauma and insight into one's own schizophrenia. In my case, I never experienced childhood trauma. I was not neglected or emotionally/physically abused. I did, however, witness violence in my household. I escaped being beaten, but I witnessed and overheard my two siblings getting "disciplined."

I feared the punishments, so I grew up to be passive and sneaky, in respect to my parents. I walk around with a sense of guilt and helplessness for not being able to stop the physical alterations. I developed an "every man for himself" philosophy, as a result. Sympathy for others can be a struggle for me occasionally.

I have lacked insight into my mental illness, at my lowest and most psychotic point. But now that I am medication-compliant and actively reaching out for help/counsel, things have gotten better for me. I also continually research my mental illness, which helps me tremendously, to have insight into my schizoaffective disorder.

To read about the study, click on the link below.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/31028001?dopt=Abstract

***When I said that I occasionally lack sympathy, I was not referring to the Synagogue shooting that happened at the Chabad here in San Diego (Poway) yesterday. I am very sad, scared, and reflective. Although I am Catholic,  I have many Jewish friends & I have love for the Jewish community.

We need to stop the violence. We need to pray more! I wish that for every unbalanced person; please pray and get in touch with your spirituality; don't act in haste/violence. Life can be challenging & unfair, so you need to meditate/reflect/pray daily for your mental health, happiness, and for love/acceptance of your neighbors! 

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