Happy Halloween!

 Just a mad woman with The Not-So-Mad Happy Hatter!

At close to 8 on Halloween night, I was doing some push-ups in my bathroom and I knew the voices had something to say because I started hearing an echo. They began counting my push-ups. Then Val spoke to me.

Val: Well Happy f-Ing Halloween, stupid b-! 

What an insulting end to my night because everything had gone so well up to that point.

Matt: Ha! What is insulting is how you blame your failures in life on Venezuelan witches. Venezuelans are good people. We are not witches…well maybe one or two of us are witches actively hexing you. Happy hexing witches!! Woo hoo! Great night! This is our night!! You are getting off easily as far as I am concerned, home wrecker! We talk to you. We explain our point of view about your romantic atrocities.  For our part, that is nothing. You have a lot to repent over and reform. Not that you seem to absorb and follow a word we say unfortunately. So what are you thinking of doing about Trey Sanders? You better stay away from him and our loved one Maeve. You have only seen a fraction of what we are capable of. Halloween has nothing on us! Watch us rock your world every day until the bitter end. Be forewarned!

Toxic ex lurking

I was just reading on Reddit about what to do if a toxic ex begs you to come back and then I see this toxic ex drive past me. I have a toxic ex from many many years ago in Los Angeles named Tony. I still see him driving past me in Carlsbad sometimes. Maybe it is just an awake nightmare.  I don’t know what he thinks he is doing. It’s long over between us. He was so toxic and he used to scream at me and beg me to come over for basically a late night booty call and then be mean to me the whole time. He doesn’t seem to get that I still don’t reciprocate his feelings for me. We are not “Bobby and Whitney,” like he used to say. I don’t want to be in a relationship with a toxic thug.  Stupid Tony!  Go home, scrub!!

Pictures from the Saturday before Halloween 2022

 In the top photo I tried to photograph the sunset and the moon rise in the same photo. The middle picture is just moi cheesing it up. The bottom photo is a crescent moon between two palm trees. 

Oh I saw the eskateboarder again tonight. I am going to snap a picture or video of him next time I see him. lol He’s amazing!

Awful but lawful

Maeve: Your blog is definitely “awful but lawful.” Is that a new term you learned today? Yes your blog is awful and slanderous and racist against Venezuelans in particular. You should be ashamed of yourself for blogging such nonsense. Your blog is so awful that is should be illegal and if we have anything to do with it, you will be canceled too. Your blog should be removed from Google Blogger! We protest!! We are going on strike!! Well actually not really! We will never shut up, but we despise you and despise being a part of this blog. That’s why we hex you! We hate you so we are hexing you! Be forewarned! 

Val: Are you going to a family funeral tomorrow in Dana Point? We may have had something to do with that. That’s where you will end up soon…burnt to a crisp and buried below the earth. If we had our way, that is where you would be already. One by one, you will watch your closest family members drop dead in the near future. Wait and see what the future holds for you and those closest to you, on account of us. Psyche! We are not killers. That is just another racist trope in your writing here. But we certainly wouldn’t mind seeing you suffer as you have wreaked havoc in our lives. We hex you to have the darkest weekend culminating in an even darker Halloween, courtesy of the Dark Arts.. Be forewarned!

Matt: Don’t forget about the man who introduced us and caused you so much chaos and desperation. He will be celebrating Halloween in a couples costume with Maeve. It will be a very sexy surprise outfit at their annual Halloween bash in Santa Cruz. Too bad that you are not invited as you are neither his friend nor wife. You are merely his deluded stalker. We hex you to stay in Carlsbad and away from our happy family! The consequences of traveling up to Aptos and crashing our Halloween party will be “grave.” Be forewarned!

I saw a guy on a skateboard who looked like MCA

I saw a guy on a skateboard who looked like MCA  on my hot girl walk today. lol 

Matteo: Tell me more about the men who want to espouse you…the crème de la crème of men, if you will. If it’s not surfing doctors stalking you, it’s John Frusciante or some other aging rock star looking at you as a muse or good luck.  And who was that creeper riding his electric skateboard up your street so effortlessly today? He looked like MCA from The Beastie Boys but maybe taller lol. Is he courting you as he skates past you or is he simply riding by? Maybe he wants to be the subject of your next cheesy haiku? Maybe he is already in love with you? Maybe you are delusional? Yeah right, you are “definitely delusional,”so be forewarned!

Maeve: Why are you so full of yourself? You wish my surfing doctor husband was in Carlsbad driving past you. Keep dreaming! You are three times my size and way too over the hill for him! You could never compete with me! You would have better luck with your local skateboarder guy.  Maybe you can woo him by blasting your totally cool 80’s music. Maybe not! Attempting to lure my husband away from me has only brought you misunderstandings and hexing. Maybe you should wait for this new fresh meat guy to make the first move on you.  You could skate off into the sunset with him! You will be waiting a long time for him! I hex you to live the remainder of your life as a single cat lady! You will only see my husband in your dreams and this skater will eventually skate on by. Sorry, not sorry! Be forewarned!

I felt a tremor last night!

 https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2022/10/25/us/san-jose-california-earthquake/index.html

I was lying in bed last night alone and felt an earthquake! Was the earthquake that I felt last night just a premonition of the earthquake that was to take place in San Jose later in the day? I really felt an earthquake last night. It rocked me awake! I am a million miles away from you but I am with you in spirit, babe! Stay safe from those crazy Northern California earthquakes!

Happy Halloween!

 I am coming for you!!

At least he’s honest

 That’s all they want 😢 

My aura

 

Hexing the Phillies

So the San Diego Padres lost to the Phillies today knocking them out of the Finals. This picture represents how I am feeling about it. Check out my ripped Halloween costume. I hex the Phillies to lose their next game! 

I feel that it is possible that someone put a binding spell on me, as I am not experiencing much progress in my life and have had a bit of bad luck. I looked up reverse hex and binding spell today and this article popped up. Very interesting!

https://www.cultivatemagick.com/how-to-freeze-and-bind-the-actions-of-another/

More importantly I am hexing Kanye West and all the white supremists!!

Matt: Stupid bitch! So you are hexing yourself then?! Fuck, you are so fake! You’re no better! You and your Karen-ish ways are the reason we moved back to Venezuela! What with you calling the police on us and all! Now we can practice Santeria in peace! We hate you so we are hexing you…from Venezuela! Be forewarned!

Plane ✈️ following me around

I was not hallucinating. I have photographic proof! There was a plane following me around on my walk today. I live very close to Palomar Airport, so I have creepers following me around all the time.

Maeve: A day of drinking followed by a day of heightened paranoia. Go figure! You should be ashamed of yourself for continuing to drink while treating your schizoaffective disorder! No wonder you are hallucinating today…and you brag about your drinking on your Google Blogger account? You are so stupid and lost in a haze. Next you are going to suggest that it is my happily married husband who is following you around. Don’t even go there today, tramp!! My husband is here next to me in our bed in Santa Cruz… so eat your heart out! Be forewarned!

La Especial Norte

 Good food, fun, and Purple Cadillac Margaritas!

Blonde Blending in California

I hate it when people 

From the other 49 states

Worship, follow, emulate, migrate

To California 

Because you are a shade of blonde 

You assume that you will fit right in here

Wrong! You are just a poser

Shmoozing with other blonde wannabes

You are living so shallow

Summer is over anyway 

Time for the tourists to go home 

I know that I will catch hell for this. I grew up considering myself a Native Californian. But who uses the term Native Californian anymore? I am as Native as Maeve. Well actually going back to my original point, I am 100% California born and bred, unlike that brat.

Just kidding! Don’t punish me by having some beautiful & romantic vow renewal or by having a baby together. Please!! Hope to see you around Carlsbad soon!

Val:  Stupid bitch! We hate you so we are hexing you! 

Maeve: Well I am here in California now! You do not and you will not see the “real” Trey Sanders in Carlsbad. You see imposters of men who look vaguely like him, but are a fraction of the man I married. You made the biggest mistake of your life running away from him. Fortunately, your loss was my gain. We are happily wed now and we will remain so until the day we die! We are two beautiful beach blondes fated together for eternity. So you can just kiss my California blonde ass! Be forewarned!

I’m just interested in…

I’m just interested in…hanging out with my cat.  Anyone want to see another picture with me and my cat Cinnamon?

I have been so busy today that I forgot it was the anniversary of my mother’s death. No wonder I was so stressed and depressed today!

No really my title here is a quote from The Beastie Boys, “Check Your Head.” I’m just interested in the BBoys so f- you my man. I am feeling disgusting and disappointed in Kanye West and his antisemitism.

I must be a complete idiot

Flirting is strutting past me in your body hugging wetsuit carrying your surfboard and checking me out/smiling at me. I am definitely naïve if it never occurred to me that he has done this to other women. My sister Marisa ran this past me once. Maybe Keith was just flirting for the sake of flirting and there was no serious intention behind it. We never ended up together so my sister is probably right. His poor wife is the one who has to deal with him flirting with other women and apparently that is cheating whether or not it progresses from there. You can’t trust him anywhere from the beach to his work. Women love surfing doctors. It doesn’t get any better than that. I would be hexing other women too if he was my husband. He’s just too damn cute…too perfect!!

You are perfect

 I can relate!!

I remember this time

 I went off my meds in 2013. You came to spy on me in Carlsbad (in your wetsuit holding your surfboard) and I thought to myself…”This is it! He has come to rescue me from my imperfect life!”  I was fine. I had a beautiful family and children to raise. What was I thinking? I started trying to lose weight in order to compete with your wife and to look good for you. That started in 2013 actually. We are no closer today to ending up together than we were back then. I did look cute here though with my anchor tee. I am the anchor of my family. Never been sailing and probably never will. Enjoy your sailboat though ⛵️!

Praying for the Padres

 Last time the San Diego Padres lost to the LA Dodgers I made the mistake of screaming “Viva Los Doyers!” right before the game. I am not doing that tonight because I am rooting for the Padres and want them to win. I hex the Dodgers to lose. Viva Los San Diego Padres!! Saint Francis is next to me in this picture. The spirit of St Francis pray for us San Diego Padres & fans!

Val: You are from Los Angeles and no one likes you in San Diego anyway so who cares who wins. I hope your team loses. I hex the Padres to lose and I am a witch.  I know what I am doing! You and your team are going down tonight. Be forewarned!

Val: It’s not a nail biter when you could care less who wins. You don’t fit in anywhere. Why are you expending so much energy to support the Padres over the Dodgers? You watching the end of this game will do nothing to secure a win for your team. You are not a good luck charm! I am hexing the Padres now! Watch the tides turn and your team ultimately lose this game. Be forewarned!

Me: Beat LA! I have lived in San Diego since 1999. I don’t have any animosity towards LA. I am just rooting for my team! Beat LA! It looks like we are going to win!!

 

Me: Yea!! Exciting on many levels!!

Val: We have mixed emotions about this win. I repeat that you are not a good luck charm. We lived in San Diego for many years. We still consider ourselves San Diegans. We are happy for them. You, however, are now and will always be a loser. Be forewarned!

Friday night: what just happened?

Matt: Ha ha! So, You saw a public transit bus drive past you today with demonic laughter bellowing from it? Well the jokes on you!  That was no prank from one Trey Sanders. That was not Santeria either. You were merely hallucinating, as usual. Meanwhile Trey is on a luxury vacation with his wife in rockin’ Northern  California. His exact location is unknown or at least we are not telling you where he is, as you would likely crash their “vacation/love fest.” You need to get a life of your own! Be forewarned!

Maeve: Have you noticed that Trey is not in Carlsbad? Also, Have you been envying our many exquisite vacations? Well envy away because we are on another sexy sailing adventure somewhere between Santa Cruz and Monterrey. We are celebrating our anniversary with friends on our sailboat. You can be quite sure that you will never get a taste of the sailing life. You are too old to learn how to sail and we all hate you. There’s no room on our sailboat for you. Wake up! You can just kiss my ass, as Trey would never leave me for you. I don’t need Santeria love potions or silly witchcraft rituals to keep him either. I’m “hot” and I am a devoted lover, who is full of surprises. Trey is definitely not interested in a romantic relationship with you. Get that through your head. It will never come to pass! Be forewarned!

It’s probably for the best

Maybe it’s for the best that we never got married 

Absolutely no one is jealous of my life and for who I married 

Although sometimes I wonder if I am wrong about that 

Look at it this way

I spared you from my toxic family who are mostly off their rockers

No one will ever make you feel less than or different because of your partial Jewish ancestry 

No one will ever pressure you to convert to Catholicism 

You won’t be left responsible for my children 

Personally, for me, the single life is not so bad 

I have the company of my children 

I have the company of my cats

I have made a few nice friends here in Carlsbad 

I will always think of you and reminisce though 

Always 

I wish you and your wife the best truly

I am happy that you are happy 

Enjoy your life!

My haircut

Val: She got a haircut. We should hex her new haircut. She cut off her dead ends. We should hex her remaining hair to die an ugly death too. We should have hexed her hairdresser for an unsteady hand and a mysterious new cough to appear during Danielle’s haircut. The only reason we have not hexed your hairdresser is because she is Latina. We have mixed emotions about her. We are surprised that you have chosen such a strong Latina for your hairdresser, as you appear to fear us so much. You have been reading the stories about Giselle Bundchen and how she is a witch. I can tell you with great certainty that she really is a witch but no one cares. Do not get your hopes up that anyone is listening to your story. Do not get your hopes up that anyone will come for us to put a stop to our hexes. No one will ever stop us from practicing our witchcraft. Be forewarned!

The worst kind of trickery

My brain plays with me

The worst kind of trickery 

When every man 👨 in Encinitas looks just like you

Halloween party 2022

 

My statement teeshirts

Val: Your statement teeshirts are a joke!

Maeve: Why are you trying to attract my husband with corny teeshirts that say things like “I left my heart in San Francisco?”  We don’t even live in San Francisco. It’s Santa Cruz. Trey Sanders is from Aptos to be exact. Get it straight!!

Matt: Let’s talk about your biggest insecurity. Your double chin is a public eyesore. It is disgusting and what are you doing to lose weight? You just ate a cupcake in the middle of the afternoon for no reason at all! You should dress up as Wilbur for Halloween. Not the kook. I mean the pig but you could pull off either. Have a weekend…and don’t wonder too much how we are spending ours. We know that you are manifesting a witch costume for Halloween. Halloween is for amateurs anyway. Witches hate you so we are hexing you. Be forewarned!

My father has a nickname for me

 My father has a nickname that he has called me before. I am El Pollo Loco or “the crazy chicken.” because I am always going there to eat.  He hates El Pollo Loco but I like it.  I do love eating chicken and I admit to that. I never ate El Pollo Loco before moving to Carlsbad. Upon moving here, I started eating El Pollo Loco all the time hence the nickname. I probably overindulged in fast food which contributed to my weight gain. I don’t blame fast food as much as I blame my antipsychotic though . I gained a ton of weight after moving here and I went into hiding. Carlsbad is a beach community but I didn’t want to get made fun of so I avoided going out especially going  to the beach. I dreaded running into people from my past because I didn’t like how I looked. I felt like a loser because I was unemployed. Before that, I felt on top of the world. In college, I thought I was really going places and I had the world at my feet. Reality hit me upon graduation and moving to a new city where I didn’t have any friends. All of that  contributed to my insecurity. Then one day I was walking around Carlsbad Village with my parents and bumped into some familiar faces from college days. I had a total panic attack. “El Pollo Loco” took over and I ran from those guys from days past. My Dad was right. I really am a crazy chicken. That was the day I blew off my soulmate and potential future husband. As Cher sings, “If I could turn back time…”

My guardian angel

 My guardian angel watches over me while I sleep.

I would like to thank my 1 follower

 I would like to thank my 1 follower for following me. I know that the rest of my visitors can hit the follow button too and I don’t know what is stopping you. Also my story The Voices by Danielle Flore is available on Amazon. Thank you!

Our time has arrived!

 We are going! See you there!

Matt: No one wants to see your fat ass naked! Be 

forewarned!

Maeve: If you had moved to Santa Cruz many years ago, like I did, you would have gotten this nakedness thing out of your system, while you still felt hot and looked halfway decent. Be forewarned!

Val: Your time has arrived? No it has not! This is fake news. Trey is still in Santa Cruz with Maeve, so you can march right out to Jacumba Hot Springs by yourself. I hope you boil out there! Be forewarned!