I still believe that I am being hexed

 I believe that I am being hexed and most definitely messed with, to say the least! Keith drives down to Carlsbad all the time to taunt me and make me think about him. It distracts me from my relationship and my reality. I always go down the road of romanticizing the past and the missed opportunities. I imagine that I had all these opportunities with Keith that I really never did. If Keith is so interested in me, why doesn’t he ever make that solid break from his wife and move down here? I keep beating myself up and blaming myself. It is such a waste of time to do that. It’s painful and pointless. I also believe that his wife is truly jealous of Keith’s feelings for me and has it out for me. I tried to tune them out for so long by avoiding looking at their social media. It always makes me so jealous to view their loveydovey, annoying posts. It doesn’t help that Keith’s wife is an unbelievable show off. She gets off on women, mainly me, being jealous of her. She really milks putting out there how good she has it and how spoiled she is. I find myself competing with her for no reason and trying to make my social media pictures similar to hers, if not better. I feel prettier than her since getting fat injected into my face but I really struggle with my weight. Keith’s wife  is a petite gym rat who has never been pregnant or given birth. I mean she is tiny and tough to beat, in terms of body. I do think she works out to keep her leverage over me, whereas I am totally unmotivated to break a sweat and I let my gym membership lapse. In 2019 my mother died and I hit a new weight low point. I mean I gained a lot of weight by the beginning of 2020. It is so odd because on my birthday, January 27th,  in 2020 I peeped their social media photos once again to see this public picture of Keith carrying his wife around in his arms and posing for pictures in front of their house. On my birthday, of all days, it was a slap in the face. He knows full well that January 27th is my birthday. Keiths wife was is and will always be a conceited bitch and I think that Keith will always have unresolved feelings for me and unresolved anger at me. It’s probably better that we remain apart because I think that they have it out for me more than Santeria and what they are saying to me telepathically. They get a sick kick out of messing up my life and just generally taunting me. Life keeps happening to me, while I’m busy making other plans with Keith. Then I peep their social media posts and I get slapped in the face with reality. One of the things bothering me is that Stephen reminded me that if I never fell for Keith, leading to my divorce from Stephen, and we had stayed in our home together, the beautiful house that we shared would have been completely paid off by now. Sigh! I am becoming keenly aware that Keith and his wife are both Type A assholes, nothing like me, and no one that I would care to know. You can keep your “carrying-you-over-the-threshold-in-every-picture-stooge!  I hate you both, bitches!